23 Nov 09 Couple Connection enters the War on Soap Operas
Whether you are a Corrie, EastEnders, Hollyoaks or an Emmerdale fan, couples having relationship rows due to affairs and money problems owing to the recession are at the heart of most story lines.
But how does one cope, when like in soap operas, we constantly experience rows in our day to day lives with our partners? UK Charity, the coupleconnection.net, an online service which provides relationship advice and support helps us to understand why some arguments are not healthy and provides some practical tips and tools on how to argue better.
With little that can drag us and our children away from our television screens, soap operas are becoming an increasingly bigger part of our home environments. One could forget that it is fiction and that the behaviour displayed is more than just another way of keeping us hooked until the next episode.
Just as depicted in soaps, children are susceptible to the negative impacts of constant rows between parents.
The coupleconnection.net reminds us that whilst it is natural for couples to disagree, some constant rows are detrimental to children. And that no matter how bad the problem seems, if you remember that you can sort it by making your arguments constructive, it is a good learning experience especially for your children.
Perhaps Max and Tanya Branning of Albert Square have a lot to learn from how to manage the aftermath of arguments within the family unit. And what a positive learning experience it would be for their daughters.
Not forgetting the recent ups and downs experienced by just about every couple in Hollyoaks! Including one of the shortest marriages on record, with Carmel McQueen & Calvin Valentine, tying the knot and subsequently splitting up a short time later, unable to cope with the pressures of wedded life. It is a constant reminder that financial pressure could further exacerbate arguments within couple relationships.
The coupleconnection.net aims to help couples throughout the UK to tackle relationship issues before they escalate. With the release of the new guide on how to argue better it brings a fresh take on relationship issues in ways that are rarely depicted in storylines. Arguments don’t always have to lead to screaming matches that involve the entire neighbourhood; if looked at differently, they can be a healthy communication when carried out in a productive and constructive manner.
20 Oct 09 The Credit Crunch and You
The Couple Connection finds out how the people on the street are coping with the effects of the credit crunch on the quality of their relationships with their partners.
As money becomes one of the main causes of arguments in couples relationships today, finding resolutions whilst staying connected with your partner may become harder, and you may feel like there is no where to turn to for help.
The CoupleConnection.net, an online service which provides relationship advice and support for couples, offers hints and tips on how to cope with the effects of the credit crunch through their easy 3 step approach ‘Check it Out’, ‘Talk it Out’ and ‘Work it Out’, based on the five stages (exploring, understanding, making plans, making changes and reviewing) – that can help to improve relationships and help build personalised plans for the future.
Here’s how the credit crunch has affected some of the people who have used the Couple Connection’s resources for advice and support:
Joe is a 33 year old male who was made redundant this year
Joe had a job as a plumber for a local company where he had worked for the last 8 years. He always thought that his position was secure but due to the credit crunch his boss was left with a number of large outstanding bills and took the decision to close the business. Joe has been looking for new employment since being made redundant 8 months ago, but to no avail. This has put immense pressure on his relationship as he was hoping to ask his girlfriend of five years to marry him they have been talking about it for some time now. Joe now feels that the time is not right as he will not be able to finance the wedding but his girlfriend has her heart set on it. Joe has used the arguing checklist to try to make sure that their arguments are more productive. They are using the Couple Connection advice to work out a plan for their future together.
Louise is a 28 year old woman with a 5 month old baby
Louise and her partner made the conscious decision to try for a baby about eighteen months ago. They decided that if they were going to wait for a time when they felt financially secure they may not ever decide to have children. They saved as much as they could whilst Louise was pregnant but she admits that they have to be very careful with what they spend as she only receives statutory maternity pay. There have been times over the last few months when money has caused Louise and her partner to argue when previously they would not have done so. Louise says “We have always had a very solid relationship. It is very tricky for us at the moment we are new parents which is very exciting but at the same time our relationship is suffering. We knew things would change with the baby but money is the issue at the moment. We try to sit down and talk about our problems but it is not always easy and usually ends up in a row. I never knew there were places like the Couple Connection which can help you. I’ve found it really useful especially the Better Way to Argue feature.”
Michelle is a 45 year old mother of four
Michelle is a mother of four kids ranging in age between 9 and 17 years. She has been with her partner for the last 11 years. Ever since the children were small she has always worked and at the moment works part time as a shop assistant. Her income was, in the past, used to top up her partner’s by paying for school uniform, school trips, saving for family holidays and paying for Christmas presents. Michelle has found recently that she and her partner have been arguing more and more about money. Before the credit crunch Michelle would give the children extra money for going out at the weekend with their friends, now both incomes are used for day to day living instead. This is causing the children to question why they have suddenly been told that they can’t do their usual activities. As any other parent would, Michelle tries to find a way round it but, this often causes her to argue with her partner who says the children, especially the older ones, should understand and she should tell them that no. Michelle and her partner are using the What About the Kids advice to make sure that that they manage the fallout of their arguments in the best way possible.
Contrary to popular belief, arguments, as a form of communication do not have to be destructive. Disagreements within relationships are inevitable; after all as individuals we all have different views. These different opinions may contribute to some of the reasons you were attracted to your partner in the first place. Instead of feeling like your relationship is not working why not try using the Couple Connection How to Argue guide to turn it into positive communication. Most importantly remember there is help available for you and your partner to get your relationship back on the road to a better life together.
Tags: How to Argue
09 Oct 09 Rows, Barneys, Squabbles, Tear Up, Arguments! Are they ALWAYS bad for your relationship?
UK relationship advice service www.thecoupleconnection.net puts to rest common relationship myths that affect an increasing number of couples suffering from the added strain of the credit crunch.
With all the negative press about the economy it is very easy for us to think that it is all doom and gloom – stuck in a loop with your partner arguing about the same points. It’s also common for the stress of money problems to leave you frayed and easily susceptible to dysfunctional arguments. The Couple Connection, a UK charity, can help you and your partner back to a healthier relationship with free advice and support. How to Argue Better is a brand new guide from www.thecoupleconnection.net to help couples cope with relationship issues from the recession.
Here are some everyday relationship myths that illustrate how vital communication is for couples and the whole of the family.
“Having a good relationship with my partner means no arguing.”
We are bombarded with images in the press of “perfect” couples thus reinforcing the common myth that a healthy relationship with your partner means one without arguments. In fact, arguments can be very healthy for your relationship. As unique individuals, it is only natural to have disagreements. The key is to make sure you argue constructively; to avoid the same subjects becoming “no go areas” in your relationship. The Couple Connection How to Argue Better guide can help you and your partner argue in a constructive way – perhaps reaching a compromise without so much hostility.
“My partner doesn’t understand me”
A very common statement made by a large number of people who are experiencing difficulties in their relationship. Remember, it maybe less about your partner not understanding you and more that you each have different viewpoints. It might be that you and your partner need to change the way you communicate with each other.
“The kids don’t know there is a problem.”
Children are very receptive to their environment and can pick up on the smallest changes in the atmosphere. For example, a recent survey carried out by Asda (July 2009) showed that 18% of parents thought their children worried about money, but in actual fact when children were asked the figure was 55% were worrying about money. A surprising result highlighting that children pick more from their environment than their parents often give them credit for.
If you are parents as well as partners, help your children cope better…
Explain – you are arguing but are trying to sort it out
Reassure – it’s not their fault and you love them
Try to argue better – follow our how to argue guide to help resolve your disagreements
Communication is the vital ingredient in many successful relationships. Remember that all couples have disagreements; it does not mean that it is the end of a relationship. The Couple Connection can help you improve your communication skills so that you and your partner enjoy a healthier, happier relationship.
Tags: Arguments, How to Argue, Money, Recession
24 Sep 09 Credit Crunch Bust Ups: A Guide to Arguing for Couples Struggling in the Recession
Couple Connection launches their How to Argue guide for couples finding it difficult to cope in the credit crunch.
If the recession is affecting relationships in your family, where can you turn for advice and support? Many people feel embarrassed seeking help when they are having problems with their partner. However, www.thecoupleconnection.net , a UK relationship advice service has launched a How to Argue Guide for couples, giving you a road map back to a healthier relationship.
Many couples say money problems can be the source of arguments especially when couples suffer from added pressure of debt or unemployment. One partner may feel that the other is spending too much money at a time when they either can’t afford it or should be saving in case they lose their job. The other partner may feel that they are being put under intense scrutiny for buying a more expensive brand. While these arguments may start about money, they can escalate into other issues, so it is important that people in relationships are aware of to each others’ sensitivities.
There is a general misconception that it is bad to argue with your partner. Don’t get pressured into thinking that it is always bad to argue, it can be healthy for relationships and arguments give partners the opportunity to air their concerns rather than letting them simmer away and build into bigger issues. Arguments can strengthen your relationship. They can help you and your partner to reach a compromise with less acrimony.
If the stress of the recession is affecting your family relationship, then this guide gives you tips about how to argue better, where to go for help and staying connected with your partner. Children are affected by constant arguments and tensions in their environment. Couple Connection helps you manage the “fall out”, deal with questions from your children and reduce the impact of relationship stress on your child.
The How to Argue Guide for couples gives you tools to “sort out” arguments in your relationship brought about by the recession: These include recognising when it’s not a good time to talk, resisting blaming and criticising your partner, trying to respect the other point view and putting a to repeating the same points over and over again when its not getting either of you anywhere.
With the recession looming high, the highest unemployment figures for over a decade, the consistent bombardment from newspaper and media, relationships in families are under more strain. The International Labour Organisation unemployment figures for May to July (2009) reported 2.47million people currently unemployed – over 200,000 more unemployed people than the same time last year. The additional stress and worry of money problems can make you feel like you’re stuck in a rut or at the centre of a warzone. Bickering, repetitive arguments and blazing rows can become the norm and a route back to the way things used to be can feel impossible.
You don’t have to end up feeling like there is no way out or that the only solution is separation. Be proactive, discover the techniques to sort problems out with your partner – Visit www.thecoupleconnection.net
Tags: Arguments, How to Argue, Money, Recession
